An excerpt from Sir Germy Marries By Stacey McGee
Once upon a time, far away, there lived a princess. Her name was Princess Leela. One day while Princess Leela was taking a walk in her garden, she saw a man throwing dirty tissues all over the place. The princess knew that dirty tissues would spread harmful microbes.
“Pick those up,” she yelled in her icky sweet voice.
“You want them picked up, you pick them up,” the guy replied.
“I’m going to tell Daddy!” Princess Leela flew toward the castle, crying.
“Oh, brother,” the guy muttered. He continued down the street, throwing dirty tissues.
Princess Leela found her daddy, King George the 23rd, in his study. “Daddy, a really ugly man was going down the street, throwing dirty tissues everywhere. And he wouldn’t pick them up when I told him to.”
“Oh no! It’s Sir Germy,” cried the king.
Just then, Sir Germy jumped through the window. He grabbed the princess and jumped back out the window carrying the princess away.
“After him,” cried the king, but no one heard him. He ran out of the room and found Rob, Princess Leela’s boyfriend. He told Rob that Sir Germy had kidnapped Leela.
Rob dressed in shiny armor and jumped on a horse as white as chalk. The king jumped on a horse as black as a witch’s hat.
“Don’t you want armor, Sir?” asked Rob.
“And cover up my beautiful silk clothing? Never!” replied the king.
For the rest of the story, see the new edition of The Best of Critique Café, available on Amazon.com November 18th. Also available at Fort Stockton Public Library for a donation to the H. Edward Petsch Memorial.